One of the most common misconceptions for people living with Multiple Sclerosis, as well as for other chronic illnesses and diseases, is that because of this diagnosis, you are no longer a sexual being.
Society desexualizes people who have disabled bodies, and because of this, it is easy for those of us who experience things like MS to also experience shame around being desexualized, as well as struggles in our romantic relationships.
The way we understand and approach sex is influenced by our family of origin, our religion, our culture, society, and our past experiences of sex (i.e. sexual trauma). When you take this, and you add on an additional layer of something painful and uncertain like MS, it can definitely have an impact on us.
However, the idea that people with MS do not and cannot have an interest in sex could not be further from the truth.
Having MS doesn’t automatically mean you never want to have sex again. It does not mean that nobody will ever want to have sex with you. It does not mean that you will never have pleasurable, enjoyable, fulfilling sex again.
What it does mean, however, are the following things:
- Sex with MS may look different than it did previous to your diagnosis
- You may have to have more in-depth and open conversations about sex with your partner and your healthcare provider
- You may experience some difficulties when engaging in sexual activities with MS, but it is not uncommon for people (with or without MS) to experience sexual problems)
In 2019, I did a live webinar with the Multiple Sclerosis Association of America in which I discussed sexual connection and intimacy for people with MS in relationships.
Along with this, I touched on the subjects of:
- The importance of being open about sex
- The myths and truths about sex (both with and without MS)
- How to approach and begin family planning
- Things to avoid when communicating with your partner(s)
- And a Q & A at the end!
This webinar would be incredibly helpful for anyone who is, or who has a partner who is, experiencing MS in a relationship.
To watch the full webinar, please go here.
If you need help prioritizing sex in a relationship with MS, connect with a sex therapist in Seattle at Healing Moments Counseling.